J.R.A. - By Chance (You & I) (ORIGINAL)

Agents of Secret Stuff (A.S.S) OST

Sige Lang / think-a-lots part 26

2:55PM May 10, 2011 Tuesday

nagbblog habang nasa work? you bet..kahit na sobrang busy nakakapagblog parin..
as of now gumagawa ako ng case study and at the same time media plan for another project..plus other stuffs na ipinapautos ng mga boss..
gusto ko lang talaga magtype ng magtype ngayon..hindi ko naman kasi sya makausap ng matagalan..ok naman kasi kahit papano nagrereply sya kahit "okay"..ok na ko dun..mababaw lang talaga ako..konting bagay masaya na tulad nyan..isang text or miss call lang ok na ko..haii...
ewan ko ba..ewan ko ba kung ilang beses ko ng sinabi ung "ewan ko ba" sa mga blog ko..bakit ba parang wala akong nakikitang matinong dahilan or explanation sa mga nararamdaman ko at sa mga ginawa ko..sorry..pero alam ko tanga talaga ako..wag nyo na sanang ipangalandakan..kung ganun lang din ang pag-aayos ng personal na problema para hindi makadamay ng iba..tanggap ko na..tanga ako..inisip ko lang na mas mabuti sigurong hindi ko na idamay sa problemang personal..pero alam kong sumobra ako ng di ko namamalayan..as in sobra sobra..hanggang sa umabot sa ganito..sa ngayon ok lang kahit hindi sya masyadong nagrereply di tulad nung dati..kasalanan ko naman eh..

update ko nalang to mamaya kasi nasa bahay pa ung mga gusto ko talagang ilagay dito sa blog na to....

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12:24PM May 11 2011 Wednesday

work mode again.. andami pang gagawin pero kinakaya naman..type lang ng type..hanggang sa mapagod ang kamay kakatype..

parang north pole dito sa office..sobrang lamig and at the same time pinapatay namin ung ilaw para "computer shop" ang dating..para di agad mastress ang mata..buong araw ba naman nakaharap sa computer eh..

just a simple call or text would make my day..sobrang babaw ko na daw sabi ng pinsan ko..sa pinanganak akong mababaw eh..tsaka ok na din ako sa ganito..konting bagay lang masaya na..oh diba text nga lang ok na...kahit call nga eh.. kaso nasa meeting ako nun..sayang lang talaga...pero i think wala akong masasabi sa phone kung sinagot ko man..pakikinggan ko lang ung boses nya kung magsalita man sya...pero ok lang kahit hindi..kahit maikling reply ok lang..masaya na ko..hands down pa..
sorry pero mababaw lang talaga ako..akala ng iba ang hirap ko pasayahin pero hindi..kabaligtaran..sobrang dali lang.. ung iba kasi iniisip na porke't guy mahirap ng pasayahin..ung tipong kelangan ng ganito ganyan..well oo nga me mga ganung tao pero i exclude myself to those kinds..candy nga lang masaya na ko eh..or kahit simpleng tambay ok na ok na..
may nagsabi sakin na hindi daw ako nakakaappreciate..or hindi ko naaappreciate ung mga bagay na ginagawa ng ibang tao para sa kin o sakin..well in fact, its a no, naappreciate ko lahat hindi ko lang napapakitang naaappreciate ko kasi hindi naman ako sanay magexpress ng magexpress eh..hindi ako expressive na tao since stone age..ano ba naman ung sobrang babaw na nga na tao tapos hindi nakakaappreciate..anong connect?
nung sunday nga pala nag rest in peace na ung tita ko..kasabayan ng bagyo..anlakas ng ulan dun sa manila memorial pero dahil wala sa mood (emote:sad) nagbabad sa ulan..buti nga di nasira ung fone ko habang nagtetext ako eh..walang payong payong..di uso un..basa kung basa...kaya aun..nagikot kami dun sa manila memorial..pinuntahan namin ung mausoleum ng mga Aquino..hindi naman halatang problemado eh..naulan kaya di halata..naalala ko pinapauwi na ko ni mome nun..wag daw akong magbabad sa ulan kasi nga daw nabagyo..pati sina bii tsaka rizza nagtext eh..katuwa...pero hindi eh..wala ako sa mood para makinig sakanila that time..hanggang sa tumila ung ulan andun lang ako..then after that nagdecide na kong umuwi...hinihintay ko nga na umulan ulit eh..para magbababad ako ulit....
ayoko magreply nung nagtanong sya kung sino pwedeng tawagan..kasi baka wala din akong masabi eh...magssorry lang ako ng magssorry sakanya....pero alam ko useless na din magsorry kasi paulit ulit nalang..pero gusto ko humingi ng sorry......

kung kelangan nyo lang ng kausap tumawag lang kayo..ready to answer naman ako kahit anong oras eh..kahit last option nyo kong tawagan ok lang din..atleast nasa option nyo ko diba.........

Hi

Girl, you just caught my eye

thought I should give it a try

and get your name and your number

go grab some lunch and eat some cucumbers

WHY, DID I SAY THAT?

I don't know why.

But you're smilin' and it's something' I like

on your face, yeah it suits you

Girl, we connect like we have bluetooth

I don't know why

I'm drawn to you

Could you be the other one so we'd equal two?

And this is all based on a lucky chance

that you would rather add then subtract

You and I

could be like Sonny and Cher

honey and bears

You and I

could be like Aladdin and Jasmine

lets make it happen

La La's

Hey

How've you been?

I know that it's been awhile.

Are you tired 'cause you've been on my mind

runnin' thousand and thousands of miles

Sorry, I know that line's outta style

but you

you look so beautiful on that starry night

loving the way the moonlight catches your eyes and your smile

I'm captivated

your beauty is timeless never outdated

I don't know why

I'm drawn to you

Could you be the other one so we'd equal two?

and this is all based on a lucky chance

that you would rather add then subtract

You and I 

could be like Sonny and Cher

Honey and bears 

you and i could be like Aladdin and Jasmine lets make it happen 

la la la 

Babe

It's been 5 years since that special day

when I asked you on our first date

I guess it's safe to say

You and I 

are better than Sonny and Cher

Honey and bears 

You and I

Are better than Aladdin and Jasmine 

We've made it happen

lalalalalala

Let me say

You look so beautiful on our wedding day

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1:07PM May 12 2011 Thursday

still in the office..enjoying the darkness with just the computer screen light on..maybe i'm just looking for an emergency outlet for my thoughts as of the moment..and here i am, ninja-ing the net connection here to write a blog about my useless thoughts..why useless you may ask?..i just thought of it that way...nothing more nothing less...

LSS with the song By Chance (You and I)..why?..i just fancy listening to it right now..good music and lyrics...almost all of the songs on my playlist are oldies or sad songs...this is not my player..its my bro by the way...

i can't seem to focus on my work everyday..i know i'm thinking too much and i know that i'm thinking about her all the time..what can i do?..can't help thinking about her everytime i see her posts on plurk and fb...i just miss her alot...most of the tropa knows that....

Late Night / think-a-lots part 25

1:08AM May 5 2011 Thursday

i can't sleep..i decided to sleep by 930...actually slept by 10 and woke up by 12.. and i thought i was asleep for more than 6hours already..i still have work tomorrow so please let me sleep...

actually waiting for my mom..i don't know if she has plans of going home today..she's in Manila Memorial right now if i'm not mistaken..my other ninangs and titas just arrived from riyadh..

my first day on my internship was actually pretty good..i'm surrounded by very cheerful people well, except for the other interns..masyadong maligalig ung mga nagttrabaho dun which is actually cool considering the fact na nasa office nga kami..siguro kung office, kami na ung pinakamaingay..kain dito, tawa doon...kahit na madaming ginagawa at nakaupo sa harap ng computer for 7hours straight okay naman...sanay na tsaka hindi boring..super lively which is kabaligtaran nung naffeel ko...

halo halo na ung nararamdaman ko..gusto ko nman sumaya kahit isang araw lang..pagbigyan nyo naman ako...just one day for the whole month okay na ko....

patulugin man lang sana ako ng mas hihigit pa sa 3hours oh..kahit isang gabi lang...

kung pwede lang idetach ang utak bago matulog ginawa ko na eh...sa tuwing magbabalak akong matulog gumagana ung isip ko at napapaisip ako bigla....

ayaw ata ako patulugin ni papa jack eh..hanggang 2 pa cla so mga ganung oras pa ko makakatulog..nagblog lang ako para may magawa..sobrang down ko na kahit yata tumagay ngayon di ko magawa...hindi na nga nag-agahan kanina, wala pang lunch..nagluto ng dinner pero di naman kumain...mamaya? skyflakes mode nalang...

Pagkakataon

Shamrock

Nabuhay muli ang damdamin

Nang magtagpo ang landas natin

Kay tagal nating di nagkita

Binibining kay ganda, kumusta ka?

Wala ka pa ring pinagbago

Kinikilig pa rin 'pag tinititigan mo

Sa kilos mong mapang akit

Mga balahibo ko'y tumitindig

Kung dati'y di ko nagawa ang magtapat

Ngayon handa na kong gawin ang nararapat

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Di na kita iiwasan pa hindi tulad noon

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Upang sabihin na mahal na mahal kita

Naglakas loob ako na lumapit

(Ang pisngi mo'y namumula)

Upang marinig ang malambing mong tinig

Nang makita kang lumalapit

Tibok ng puso koy bumibilis

Noon ay hindi para sa isat isa

Ngayon tadhana na ang syang nagdidikta

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Di na kita iiwasan pa hindi tulad noon

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Upang sabihin na mahal na mahal kita

Ngayon nandito ka muli

Pangako ko ikaw lang ang iibigin

Kung pwede lang naman, kung pwede lang naman

Kung pwede lang naman

Kung pwede lang naman hanggang sa huli

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Di na kita iiwasan pa hindi tulad noon

Di ko na palalampasin ang pagkakataon

Upang sabihin na mahal na mahal kita

Mahal kita

Mahal kita

Mahal kita 

got no load para magreply sa mga text..nawalan ng pera eh..pero napatanong nalang ako nung narecieve ko ung gm nya...sana ako nalang ung tinanong nya ng ganun..para alam nya na agad ung sagot...isang malaking OO MISS NA KITA!..

ttry ko na matulog...sana di malate mamaya....

We Were There / think-a-lots part24

10:22PM April 30 2011 Saturday

so eto nanaman ako napasulat ng blog...

its a sad time for the whole clan..

my mom's eldest sister died earlier..1:25pm...hindi ako nakaabot sa hospital...sad? yes..very much..she's a good tita all along..

one problem after another then this one...so far kaya pa naman...

napasoundtrip ako ng wala sa oras nung makarating sakin ung news about my tita..i don't know why pero i was in the middle of the jeepney ride going to Parañaque then i suddenly said to manong 'para na po"...i went down several blocks away from where i should get off..crossed the road then rode a jeep back home...

i've been downloading and watching my fave anime earlier... Bokura Ga Ita, a 26 episode anime..the most realistic anime story out there..every thing that happens in the story are real..no impossibilities..quite ironic to be exact..i've watched this series for about 3 times already and still can't stop myself...my favorite part would be Episode 4...by the way..its a story of a highschool student Nanami Takahashi who eventually met Yano Motoharu..also a highschool student..

maybe you're asking why am i watching that kind of stuff..i''ll just give you 3 reasons...first one.. Best story plot for an anime.. second, i like anime...and third and most important, i can connect with the story itself...

"it's a lot easier to place the blame on yourself than someone else.. if you blame someone else, you'll just get stubborn and say you'll never forgive them.. but when you blame yourself, you can shrug it off since there's nothing you can do about it.. and you won't get angry that way, either.." - Yano Motoharu Episode 3

i love that line and the way he delivered it in front of Nana..its his defense mechanism..so that he won't be mad at somebody..just blame his self....

everyone has his own defense mechanism..like that fictional character of Motoharu..or me as stated to my last blog..its a way for people to cope and avoid conflicts..some are easier said than done..

be here...always...

be here...look...

be here...at me..

just like this, forever...

the "first time" you gave me

to overflow in the palm of my hand.

if my heart wavered alone,

it seems like everyone would vanish

on that day, you

took hold of me

even though, even though

im so unreliable.

but you still stretched out your armd and hand to me, just a little bit.

be here.. with that...

be here.. gentle hand..

be here.. of yours..

and embrace me.

the path i always walk alone

is too wide, and only makes me lonely.

if we walked together, I'd be filled with happiness, and that'd be just fine.

If you're smiling,

i want to be smiling too.

yet..yet...

it seems like i'm the only one who will disappear.

oh wind..please gently tell her..

of my feelings toward her...

the season has 8 or 9 songs in it..every OST is pretty good...yeah it's in japanese but it's subbed and so are the meaning of the lyrics..this one i forgot the title..the song makes me think of things i've done a couple of weeks back..yes..its like holy week extension because still i'm not finished with these realization stuffs...

everyone's in the way, i waved my hand, but your back is 

already swerving through the crownd of people and sinking into the evening sun.

I closed my eyes and began to remember

the words you told me. Only happy memories

are supposed to be there, but i became anxious.

why does my heart waver so?

i want to tell you about my overflowing feelings....

"I love you, i love you. I love you more than anything."

I want to turn around, run after you, catch up with you but

the sadness of the twilight sky swallowed my courage.

i'm in your smile.

even a short time after we've parted

i want to cry out like a lost child.

if only i could be honest with myself

i wouldn't had to go through this.

if Only....

yeah...if only..people commit mistakes..some of them are wrong decisions and some of them are of bigger decision making...and i'm one of those who did the biggest wrong turn in decision making...why?..because for some people could see that i already quitted..i already gave up..there are who says dummy or dumbass...but the truth is..i didn't quit..i don't quit on anyone worth fighting for...and if others are saying that i have given up on her already..the answer is a big NO...why would i waste time thinking and saying stuffs like these if i already given up?..i'm recomposing myself for the time that we will meet again..for i have wasted everything..

someone told me that..

"if that's where you at right now..you must endure and go conquer it yourself"..

i know that already..but still people are slapping it to my face..i just don't react to it..why?..i don't know how to react to it..as simple as that...how will you react if you read or heard something that you don't wanna read or hear?..how will you react to it in a snap?..well i'm not yet back to my old self so i can't process thoughts that fast..

i'm always online in facebook but i don't do much...daily routine..open fb..new tab..open gmail, yahoo mail, plurk..close tabs except facebook..minimize window..media player..turn off monitor..then lie down and think..for the past weeks i've been like this..thinking of what to do...

my friend kelci..yep she's from the trekking tropa..asked me one time..

"bakit si yano ung profile pic mo?..nakaconnect ka?"

"somewhat..bakit?.."

"wala lang..."

and now we both figured out at the same time..most of the time i act as Yano but most of the time i think like Nana..a combination of both...

still..i'm learning alot..things that i won't do again...and still...the feeling of falling in love yet again for the same girl without actually losing what i feel for her the first time, it's still here..and someone asked me.. "miss mo na siya no?" isn't the answer so obvious already?...a big YES......

watching Part 5 of the series The Borgia...5 out of 9...